Article: 138122 of soc.culture.british From: Susan Spence raynet.com> I am going to describe all my lovely sheds to you people so that nasty people like Dick Jackson will stop calling me "no-sheds". * actually a barn, but not used as such for at approx 15 years. It is nicely furnished with old roofing materials and some rusting milk cans. It also provides a home for many types of wildlife including an owl, so there are all sorts of feathers and twigs all over the floor. The collapse of roof timbers is fairly imminent and we wonder somewhat laconically if we shouldn't arrange to remove the slates from the roof before they fall in and break. This summer perhaps, after we replace the bathtub, which will almost certainly then take up residence in one of our sheds. Just in case we need a cracked bathtub sometime in the future. * the "back room" which is actually part of an outbuilding behind our house which is mostly owned by our next door neighbor. Our house was originally the cart house for the farm house to which it is attached. When it was developed into a separate piece of property the owner at the time provided "shed rights" to a portion of the nice big shed behind it. It holds old shoes and boots which have holes in them, an old bicycle, old kitchen cabinetry and a horse shoe and some old horse's teeth that we dug up in the garden. * The wash house. This building is no longer used as such, but now contains old papers, lots of old lino, old rugs, an old sink, and the microwave which used to be in my house (one of our visitors must have decided to microwave a cat or something and wrecked it). There are several scythes and a sign which says "Caution: tractors" and a toilet cistern. A shoe last would be nice and we should probably get one from my husband's cousin, who used to make clogs until he realized that driving trucks pays far better. We have a progressive lefty neighbor from Essex who blames Thatcher for this but my husband pointed out that she didn't wear clogs so it was actually HER fault. * The hen house. Lots of firewood, bicycles, and a disused pit toilet which has been boarded over. Also an antique hatstand belonging to my sister-in-law, the rusting remains of a stove. An old sign for the village shop. No hens. I had a visit to a most unsheddy-shed while I was there. My brother-in-law has built himself a new cowshed next to the "above ground swimming pool" (slurry store) and is it ever posh. Even has some sort of automatic shit-vacuum mechanism to eliminate the twice-daily task of scraping out the muck with a tractor. Article: 138201 of soc.culture.british From: DickJgnn.com (Dick Jackson) In article <4gal5c$qjterinews.ericsson.se> Susan Spence wrote: >I am going to describe all my lovely sheds to you people so that >nasty people like Dick Jackson will stop calling me "no-sheds". > >* actually a barn, but not used as such for at approx 15 years. Further descriptions of sheds deleted. Just where *are* these sheds? Your reference to your brother-in- law together with your previous disclosures about your life in, and then hasty getaway from, Yorkshire make me suspect these are sheds you left behind in England. If so, your abandonment of said sheds would truly bring you down to my level, namely "no-sheds". If I am wrong, I apologise -- but very grudgingly. DickJ Gentleman of leisure (and loving it). Article: 138484 of soc.culture.british From: Susan Spence raynet.com> DickJgnn.com (Dick Jackson) wrote: > >In article <4gal5c$qjterinews.ericsson.se> Susan Spence wrote: >>I am going to describe all my lovely sheds to you people so that >>nasty people like Dick Jackson will stop calling me "no-sheds". >> >>* actually a barn, but not used as such for at approx 15 years. > >Further descriptions of sheds deleted. > >Just where *are* these sheds? Your reference to your brother-in- >law together with your previous disclosures about your life in, and >then hasty getaway from, Yorkshire make me suspect these are sheds >you left behind in England. If so, your abandonment of said sheds >would truly bring you down to my level, namely "no-sheds". I did not make a hasty getaway from Yorkshire and they are my sheds! Even when I lived in England full-time it was not possible for me to live right next to my sheds. They were my sheds when I resided in Ipswich and Rawdon, and they are my sheds still. Did you think I sold them? Never. I'm looking forward to a wonderfully sheddy summer this year. > >If I am wrong, I apologise -- but very grudgingly. You can start with an apology however I think you ought to follow it up with expensive gifts, you jealous shedless person. Article: 138492 of soc.culture.british From: spalbion.engr.sgi.com (Simon Patience) In article <4gd607$329erinews.ericsson.se>, Susan Spence raynet.com> writes: |> DickJgnn.com (Dick Jackson) wrote: |> >Just where *are* these sheds? Your reference to your brother-in- |> >law together with your previous disclosures about your life in, and |> >then hasty getaway from, Yorkshire make me suspect these are sheds |> >you left behind in England. If so, your abandonment of said sheds |> >would truly bring you down to my level, namely "no-sheds". |> |> I did not make a hasty getaway from Yorkshire and they are my |> sheds! Even when I lived in England full-time it was not possible |> for me to live right next to my sheds. They were my sheds when |> I resided in Ipswich and Rawdon, and they are my sheds still. Did |> you think I sold them? Never. I'm looking forward to a wonderfully |> sheddy summer this year. Which implies to me that you are currently without immediate access to a shed, which is a very sad state to be in, made worse by the fact that you are a multiple shed owner. You have my sympathies. |> You can start with an apology however I think you ought to follow it |> up with expensive gifts, you jealous shedless person. This is very unsheddy though. A true shedder would be far happier with a rusty hand mower or a cherry picker with a broken handle than with expensive gifts. I think you have been away from your shed for too long. Simon. -- Simon Patience Phone: (415) 933-4644 Silicon Graphics, Inc FAX: (415) 962-8404 2011 N. Shoreline Boulevard Email: spsgi.com Mountain View, CA 94043 Article: 139496 of soc.culture.british From: Susan Spence raynet.com> DickJgnn.com (Dick Jackson) wrote: > >In article <4gal5c$qjterinews.ericsson.se> Susan Spence wrote: >>I am going to describe all my lovely sheds to you people so that >>nasty people like Dick Jackson will stop calling me "no-sheds". >> >>* actually a barn, but not used as such for at approx 15 years. > >Further descriptions of sheds deleted. > >Just where *are* these sheds? Your reference to your brother-in- >law together with your previous disclosures about your life in, and >then hasty getaway from, Yorkshire make me suspect these are sheds >you left behind in England. If so, your abandonment of said sheds >would truly bring you down to my level, namely "no-sheds". I did not make a hasty getaway from Yorkshire and they are my sheds! Even when I lived in England full-time it was not possible for me to live right next to my sheds. They were my sheds when I resided in Ipswich and Rawdon, and they are my sheds still. Did you think I sold them? Never. I'm looking forward to a wonderfully sheddy summer this year. > >If I am wrong, I apologise -- but very grudgingly. You can start with an apology however I think you ought to follow it up with expensive gifts, you jealous shedless person. Article: 139890 of soc.culture.british From: jefdrabcentral.co.nz (Jeff Drabble) spalbion.engr.sgi.com (Simon Patience) wrote: >Which implies to me that you are currently without immediate access to a shed, >which is a very sad state to be in, made worse by the fact that you are a >multiple shed owner. You have my sympathies. The sympathies are justly offered. Whilst in previous postings I have feigned a superior attitude regarding my possession of multiple sheds, truthfully it is a considerable burden to be undertaken only by those prepared to accept a life-long commitment to sheds. As I have pointed out earlier, I actually have 3 sheds proper and 8 supplementary or auxiliary sheds. My intention is not to boast, but to assure you of my profound commitment to shedding. >|> You can start with an apology however I think you ought to follow it >|> up with expensive gifts, you jealous shedless person. >This is very unsheddy though. A true shedder would be far happier with a rusty >hand mower or a cherry picker with a broken handle than with expensive gifts. I >think you have been away from your shed for too long. >Simon. I think Simon is right. We do understand that the lack of on-going shedal contact has left you anxious and bewildered. I advise 2 hours in the nearest available shed to restore equilibrium. Jeff Drabble Article: 140226 of soc.culture.british From: jefdrabcentral.co.nz (Jeff Drabble) DickJgnn.com (Dick Jackson) wrote: >l >If so, your abandonment of said sheds >|> >would truly bring you down to my level, namely "no-sheds". This matter of shedless souls has been troubling me and I am working on a solution. Working with my trusty 3D Home Design software, I am preparing plans for those like Dick and Gareth who have no space for a shed. The concept involves developing a half scale shed, incorporating all of the features of a fully fledged shed, but which one could erect in the front room. Ann Wiener set me on this line of thought when she tried to claim a room in her house as a shed. Obviously a room per se is unacceptable, but a complete, albeit small shed, erected indoors, breaks so few rules that I believe it could be deemed acceptable. I'll go with popular opinion however, as this is a very new thing in shedding, so let me know immediately if there are any objections. I see all-weather shed soirees as an obvious benefit and also, on those occasions when you find you don't like people you've invited to dinner, it's only a few steps to the sanctity of the shed. Jeff Drabble Article: 140240 of soc.culture.british From: jefdrabcentral.co.nz (Jeff Drabble) Susan Spence raynet.com> wrote: Vast snip of excellent sheddy stuff >* The hen house. Lots of firewood, bicycles, and a disused pit toilet > which has been boarded over. Also an antique hatstand belonging to > my sister-in-law, the rusting remains of a stove. An old sign for > the village shop. No hens. > >I had a visit to a most unsheddy-shed while I was there. My brother-in-law >has built himself a new cowshed next to the "above ground swimming pool" >(slurry store) and is it ever posh. Even has some sort of automatic >shit-vacuum mechanism to eliminate the twice-daily task of scraping >out the muck with a tractor. I say, Sue, you really are displaying quite awesome sheddiness these days. This post reaches new levels of shedding comprehension. This cow-shed thing should be cleared up quickly though. You see, the users of cow-sheds, shearing-sheds, train-sheds and the like are mere pretenders to shed-dom. These are buildings with a commercial purpose and as such can never achieve shediness in the way we understand it. They have hijacked the name in an attempt to bestow some of that warm, comfortable, favourite-old-woolly-jumper feel to their cold, heartless existences. The true shed is a very personal thing, like the jumper or an old shoe, it moulds to one, matching perfectly the folds and curves of ones body, so that whilst little movement within it is possible, one's comfort is assured through mutual adoption of a series complementary points in the time-space continuum. This, as you are evidently aware, is a very Zen thingy. Jeff Drabble Excuse me if you receive this twice. I cancelled and reposted it to correct some errors. Article: 141970 of soc.culture.british From: gevansmvagusta.uk.tele.nokia.fi (Gareth Evans) >>>>> "Jeff" == Jeff Drabble central.co.nz> writes: Jeff> DickJgnn.com (Dick Jackson) wrote: >> l >If so, your abandonment of said sheds >> |> >would truly bring you down to my level, namely "no-sheds". Jeff> This matter of shedless souls has been troubling me and I am working Jeff> on a solution. Working with my trusty 3D Home Design software, I am Jeff> preparing plans for those like Dick and Gareth who have no space for a Jeff> shed. The concept involves developing a half scale shed, Jeff> incorporating all of the features of a fully fledged shed, but which Jeff> one could erect in the front room. Ann Wiener set me on this line of Jeff> thought when she tried to claim a room in her house as a shed. I'm onto it, Jeff. I'm viewing a house tomorrow. It has the perfect town-house back garden. Perfect for a shed. It's about 20'x20' and paved. As yet no shed, but that can be arranged. Is it possible to buy "used" sheds? I realise most would be reluctant to sell, but I don't want to deface the neighbourhood by having a shed which is sealed and has none of the required green mould camouflage... Yours in anticipation G -- Disclaimer: I'm making this up as I go along ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- - Gareth M. Evans Software Engineer, SDH Transmission Software Group - - Nokia Telecommunications Ltd, 6 Cambridge Business Park - - Milton Rd, Cambridge, CB4 4WZ, UK. Tel: +44 1223 432445 (DDI) - - Fax: +44 1223 423139 - - Email: Gareth.Evansntc.nokia.com - ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Article: 142965 of soc.culture.british From: jefdrabcentral.co.nz (Jeff Drabble) gevansmvagusta.uk.tele.nokia.fi (Gareth Evans) wrote: >I'm onto it, Jeff. >I'm viewing a house tomorrow. It has the perfect town-house back >garden. Perfect for a shed. It's about 20'x20' and paved. As yet no shed, but >that can be arranged. 20'x20' ! You could fit four sheds in there and be the envy of us all. >Is it possible to buy "used" sheds? I realise most would be reluctant to >sell, but I don't want to deface the neighbourhood by having a shed which is >sealed and has none of the required green mould camouflage... You will generally only find them at estate auctions following the regretable death of one of our fellow shedsters. Normally a shedster would not dream of selling a shed, so the market is rather thin. Keep in mind though, that nicely seasoned componentry can be found quite readily. Ask your local council when they are doing their next bulk household collection and you can hire a truck and cruise the streets the night before, harvesting to your hearts content. Jeff Drabble Article: 143042 of soc.culture.british From: Jasper Merriweather ldta.demon.co.uk> In article <4hdj84$kvlcentral.co.nz>, Jeff Drabble central.co.nz> writes >20'x20' ! You could fit four sheds in there and be the envy of us >all. I've been staying out of this because I didn't want to seem to brag (you know -- mine's bigger than yours -- most unseemly) and also because I was earlier described as -- what was it -- a bedsit person? However, I can resist no longer. *I*'ve got a shed as big as Gareth's potential new garden. So there. And, just in case there isn't already enough of a shambles in there (and there is), rabbits bore up into it from time to time and create more. I've also got three other interesting structures that would be sheds if one side were not open, but these are used to store firewood and such, so would hardly count, anyway -- Jasper Merriweather Article: 143408 of soc.culture.british From: jefdrabcentral.co.nz (Jeff Drabble) Jasper Merriweather ldta.demon.co.uk> wrote: >I've been staying out of this because I didn't want to seem to brag (you >know -- mine's bigger than yours -- most unseemly) and also because I >was earlier described as -- what was it -- a bedsit person? Yes, well I've detected a note of truculence on your part since that comment was made, but it *was* explained. >However, I can resist no longer. *I*'ve got a shed as big as Gareth's >potential new garden. So there. And, just in case there isn't already >enough of a shambles in there (and there is), rabbits bore up into it >from time to time and create more. I've also got three other >interesting structures that would be sheds if one side were not open, >but these are used to store firewood and such, so would hardly count, >anyway The rabbits are good. Unfortunately size just does not count. It's what you do with it that counts. For instance, if you use it to house such an item as a Granada Scorpio, many demerit points could be incurred. BTW, I'm having a little trouble with the Jasper thingy. For some reason I see Jaspers as weedy geeks, and for some other reason I see you as having appreciable bulk. Perhaps a thumbnail GIF ? Jeff Drabble Article: 143564 of soc.culture.british From: zlsiidafs1.mcc.ac.uk (Dave Budd) In article <4hi8nh$61bcentral.co.nz> jefdrabcentral.co.nz (Jeff Drabble) writes: > Unfortunately size just does not count. It's >what you do with it that counts. It's not the size it's what you do with it..... Now we know why the true shedder's wife is a happy person. Shedding really is a microcosm/macrocosm thing isn't it? -- ...or something Dave Budd +44 161 275 6033 fax 6040 D.Buddmcc.ac.uk http://www.man.ac.uk:80/~zlsiida (getting better!) Article: 143565 of soc.culture.british From: spalbion.engr.sgi.com (Simon Patience) In article <4hi8nh$61bcentral.co.nz>, jefdrabcentral.co.nz (Jeff Drabble) writes: |> Jasper Merriweather ldta.demon.co.uk> wrote: |> >However, I can resist no longer. *I*'ve got a shed as big as Gareth's |> >potential new garden. So there. And, just in case there isn't already |> >enough of a shambles in there (and there is), rabbits bore up into it |> >from time to time and create more. I've also got three other |> >interesting structures that would be sheds if one side were not open, |> >but these are used to store firewood and such, so would hardly count, |> >anyway |> |> The rabbits are good. Unfortunately size just does not count. It's |> what you do with it that counts. For instance, if you use it to house |> such an item as a Granada Scorpio, many demerit points could be |> incurred. |> |> BTW, I'm having a little trouble with the Jasper thingy. For some |> reason I see Jaspers as weedy geeks, and for some other reason I see |> you as having appreciable bulk. Perhaps a thumbnail GIF ? Look at his web page and you will see that he is an appreciable geek. Simon. -- Simon Patience Phone: (415) 933-4644 Silicon Graphics, Inc FAX: (415) 962-8404 2011 N. Shoreline Boulevard Email: spsgi.com Mountain View, CA 94043 Article: 143717 of soc.culture.british From: Jasper Merriweather ldta.demon.co.uk> In article <4hi8nh$61bcentral.co.nz>, Jeff Drabble central.co.nz> writes >For instance, if you use it to house >such an item as a Granada Scorpio, many demerit points could be >incurred. The car never goes into the shed. I *can* tell the difference between a shed and a garage, and I don't have a garage. Would *you* put a car in a shed in which rabbits dig holes in the earth floor? Also, the door is a shed door -- a bit of a bugger to get through carrying a bike, never mind driving a car While I'm talking to you, I heard on the radio today that more people watch netball in New Zealand than watch rugby. Can this conceivably be true? -- Jasper Merriweather Article: 143718 of soc.culture.british From: Jasper Merriweather ldta.demon.co.uk> In article <4hilgj$10mfido.asd.sgi.com>, Simon Patience albion.engr.sgi.com> writes >Look at his web page and you will see that he is an appreciable geek. > Arseholes -- Jasper Merriweather Article: 143723 of soc.culture.british From: tjamesbgnet.bgsu.edu (James Stacey Taylor) In a previous article, jlynchldta.demon.co.uk (John Lynch) says: >In article <4hilgj$10mfido.asd.sgi.com>, Simon Patience >albion.engr.sgi.com> writes >>Look at his web page and you will see that he is an appreciable geek. > >I've got a Web page? Why did no-one tell me? Because you're a geek? tjames. Article: 144515 of soc.culture.british From: John Lynch ldta.demon.co.uk> In article <4hi8nh$61bcentral.co.nz>, Jeff Drabble central.co.nz> writes > Unfortunately size just does not count. It's >what you do with it that counts. A woman said that to me just the other day > >BTW, I'm having a little trouble with the Jasper thingy. Oddly enough, she said that, too >For some >reason I see Jaspers as weedy geeks, and for some other reason I see >you as having appreciable bulk. Perhaps a thumbnail GIF ? I am, as you surmise, not a small person > -- John Lynch Article: 144562 of soc.culture.british From: John Lynch ldta.demon.co.uk> In article <4hilgj$10mfido.asd.sgi.com>, Simon Patience albion.engr.sgi.com> writes >Look at his web page and you will see that he is an appreciable geek. I've got a Web page? Why did no-one tell me? -- John Lynch